I am now in my early 30s.where going up the steps I can feel my knees pop and all over sudden I care about which eye cream and sunscreen I should be using. Life was coming at me fast. I quickly got married and I got my daughter even quicker. During this period, I lost some good friends whom I thought we were ride or die. But as my mom would say Nii ngoma uceraga” (roughly translated: “just blame everything bad on the devil”). but as life is bound to teach you, some people are only in your life for a season. The sooner you accept that bitter fact the quicker you move on and you play that song “one monkey don’t stop no show” by King Goerge to get over those friendships. The next time a friendship or a relationship is ending just put that song on replay. Free therapy folks! You are welcome
But the one loss that almost took me out was losing my bestie.
Not that we fell out or anything but they died. At the early age of 33. FREAKING THIRTY -THREE. Nobody ever prepared me of the avalanche of feels. I remember us saying how we would choose our nursing homes, how he looks like the one who will be running people with his walker and wheel chair in that senior living. Cause he is a mchokozi like that. I haven’t gotten used to using past tense on him. It is so jarring. Cause this was not the plan. we were supposed to grow old. To participate in each other’s milestones. To vent to each other when life offers hot blows. To correct each other and to catch each other when we make dumb moves. and we made many. Like sky diving and other things, I can’t write here in case my mom reads this blog.
Aug 10th, 2024. When I received that phone call, my life changed forever. I found myself grieving and trying to write an eulogy when my eyes were nit to wet from crying. How I am still here, breathing, working and doing what I need to do is sheer miracle. I never though I would laugh ever again. I am being selfish here and making this loss about him. But so many people lost him, his family, his best friends, oh his mom!! He was the guy who would remove his shirt off his back to give it a stranger. He helped everyone in need. His loss was felt by the entire community. I am not even sure he knew the magnitude of his influence among his peers. Today I prayer that he is free of all the pain and madness that planet earth can offer.
Soldier Gal 